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On Saying No and Setting Limits/Guest Post

This is another guest post via Breathe Now by the especially talented Janice Mansfield. This post resonates with all the busy women. It is OK and necessary to say no and set boundaries. It can be hard to do so, but it is something that we all need to get better at doing! This post was originally published on July 3rd at http://breathenow.ca/2011/07/on-saying-no-and-setting-limits/. You know the axiom–if you want something done– ask a busy woman! Well, busy women (and men for that matter) need to not feel guilty at occasionally saying, no! 

Sometimes you just need a big karmic bitchslap before you’ll sit up and pay attention.  That’s kind of what this week has been like!

I’ve been feeling stretched thin the last little while, and had agreed to stretch myself a little thinner than normal by taking on a favour which I was hesitant about, but didn’t want to say “no”.  My husband did give me a little warning “… are you SURE you should be taking this on?” — should’ve probably listened to him, but the universe obliged with a little firmer follow-up later in the week.

The irony was that myself and one of the other Breathe Now co-founders found ourselves talking with Rona Maynard, one of our keynote speakers about the direction for her keynote address, and I found myself having to physically take a moment to calm down — mind and mouth racing in two directions at the same time with all the madness of the week going on.  The good news is, the moments spent with Rona on the phone did provide a little oasis of calm.  The bad news is we finished the call, and I launched right back in the crazy-making of the week — a week made busier than need-be due to my not saying “no”.

This week culminated in a high followed by a complete low point!  The high point being my friend Aaron Hall, asking me to film an episode of his new food show Delicious, at my house!  An honour, and quite interesting to see all that goes on behind the scenes!  The low point being the favour I had agreed to do, completely falling through into a complete sh*# show (sorry, no nice way of putting it!).  As I said, sometimes the universe just decides you need a giant kick in the rear before you’ll get it!

So the upside of this week is a giant re-realization that

  1. I should probably heed my intuition when I’m feeling like I’m overextending myself, or a “favour” does not line up with my business goals.
  2. I should probably also pay more attention to my husband when he gently reminds me of (1).  Thankfully, he has just shaken his head, and not given me the “I told you so”!

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