Writing A Love Letter To Someone You Dislike: What?

My spawn used some of her birthday money at the Assembly of Text on Sunday. She bought a journal, 642 Things to Write About by Raincoast. My spawn was smitten with it and was quite happy to make this purchase. I leafed through the journal and found some hilarious prompts. The journal is clearly for an adult given that there are a few prompts that speak to alcohol or more life experience, but overall the journal offers some great exercises in creative writing. I’m including a screen shot from one prompt about writing a love letter to a person you don’t like. Now, this post is not a love letter to such person or persons. But, it did make me think about what causes us to like or dislike another person. I am providing a list of traits that I immediately thought of and it is not exhaustive.

Things I like in a person (first six I thought of):

Honesty

Smile

Generosity

Intelligence

Witt

Compassion

Five things that turn me off (first six I thought of):

Dishonesty

Laziness

Arrogance

Disrespectful

Trolls

Patronizing

If I think of these traits and people who I have easily engaged with, I know that they had some or all of the six traits that I noted. We might have met at work, in the community, at a conference or at a kid-related event. And, as far as the turn offs–same places. I will add that I meet so many people each year given my work and family life. I know for a fact that I don’t click well with people who dislike strong women. There, I said it. And, yes, I have found this to be true from about high school onward.

And for the dear, sweet souls who feel that they have to stalk me online, this is not a love letter to any specific person.  That’s right–it’s not about you. The writing prompt made me think about traits. What traits do you like/dislike? Think about it–write them down and get blogging.

love letter

Another Letter to a First Year Student

Well, we are two months into a new term and it’s worth sharing this again.

I might be posting this one month too early, but it’s on my mind. And, I can always revise and post again, right? Here I offer a second installment. The previous one was really focused more so on academics and having a well-rounded first term or year at university. This installment is based merely on my opinion and experience as both an undergrad advisor and as someone who has taught first year students for my entire career.

  • If you live in the dorms try to schedule your study time at a time when you’re at your best. Chances are you are juggling a handful of classes, work, relationships, stress, and more. You need to manage your time well and I suggest that you schedule study time. This requires that you keep a schedule! Add all the assignment due dates to the schedule, and take advantage of the UVIC Library’s Assignment Calculator, and those suggested due dates in your calendar.
  • Find out where the gym is on campus. If you haven’t been there, go take a tour, and have a workout there. Get comfortable there because you’re going to need to stay healthy during the term and this includes eating right, sleeping, and exercising.
  • Find out where Health Services/Campus Clinic is on campus, and go by and check when you can get a flu shot. If you don’t believe in flu shots, then make sure you wash your hands lots, and cough/sneeze into your arm. This is so obvious that it pains me to remind people, but seeing so many leave the bathroom without washing their hands–especially during flu season makes me share this.
  • Find out where Campus Counseling office is and find out what services and workshops they offer for student success. It could end up that the Learning Center or Library offers workshops related to time management, skill-building, and more. At the campus where I work the Counseling Services office offers some great workshops and counseling sessions.
  • Before the term begins, walk around campus to get familiarized with the different buildings, and check out your classrooms, so that you don’t get lost during the first week of classes. Check out other parts of campus for good study nooks and crannies!
  • Google your instructors or at the very least look them up on the university website so that you know what they look like. Some of you might not care to do this, but others will want to make sure that they’re in the right class. You will also get familiar with what your instructor teaches and researches. This particular suggestion might be more appropriate for the transfer student, who is looking for a mentor. I’ll add to this one–go see your professor during her/his office hours.
  • Check out the student union and the different clubs on campus. You should seriously look at getting involved on campus. The degree of this involvement will vary among the students, but you really should get involved in a club or two. This will allow you a way to meet other people.
  • Your first year you are really going to take an array of courses and meet the general education requirements for your undergraduate degree. But, you really should refer to the university guidelines or department requirements for the department that you think that you will pursue your major in. Take a course or three in this area, so that you can make sure that you want to pursue this degree.

I will continue these letters to a first year student. The next one will most likely focus with peer mentoring. I truly hope that some of this is helpful! If you’re a student, bookmark this and save it. If you work with college students, please add more. I’m sure I missed something in this second installment.