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I Broke Up with Four Square: Don’t Judge

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I was an avid FourSquare user. The platform or app is a location based and you would “check in” to different places. The goal was to become the Mayor and get free coffee, discounts, and the like.  I had free coffee at certain places, free appies or my bill was discounted. Likewise, during the holidays I would get badges for saying, “Happy Fourth of July” when I checked in somewhere. I know to those unfamiliar with FourSquare or people who hate location-based apps/games, this might seem like an utter waste of time. I began to peel the band-aid off a few weeks ago deleting certain contacts from my account. I went from some 200 to just around 130 or perhaps under. I also wondered–what was I benefiting from this? Bragging Rights to the Munchie Bar as its esteemed Mayor?! But, the app had lots of my data.

My goal then became to get to 5, 000 points and I did. Then, I thought 10,000 points and I did. I was used to the check in and frankly a part of me hoped that more establishments would use FourSquare and offer deals. That really never happened to the extent that I hoped for, but some places do offer customer benefits. I just am not at those hotels or coffee shops enough. I cracked 12,000 points and thought that maybe it was time to stop. So, on Saturday, May 26th around 2pm I deleted my account. FourSquare wanted me to really think about this, though.

Well, FourSquare, it’s you. I think I might save a few minutes or possibly 20 minutes each day from here on out. And, you won’t get to document that I’m on 12 weeks running going to libraries or on fire with my 17 days in a row at coffee shops. I will admit that some of the badges were hilarious and maybe I should have taken some screen shots, but you know it was time to say bye. I also think that my girls and partner will smile when they hear that I deleted you. I guess I can be a little obsessive…

It’s been 24 hours and I am embarrassed to say that several times since I wrote this post I grabbed for my phone to check in. I definitely was power user. Now, I’ll do better things with my time. Bye Bye FourSquare–it’s me. It’s definitely me.

Pop Pop Pop Culture

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My consumption of pop culture is often informed by a few things varying from what I’m interested in, teaching, or what my family wants to see or do. This last weekend we saw some Americana, ubermasculine spectacle. I’ll give a hint, “You sunk my battleship.” Unlike many people we saw “Battleship” and enjoyed it for what it was worth, but I am ever mindful of some interesting points.

The first thing that we discussed was how the testosterone was dripping from the movie. No, it was exploding from the screen from the different characters’ bravado and the use of nothing possibly more hierarchical and masculine–the military. The movie included lots of male posturing and fighting–yawn. I won’t outline the exact plot since that is somewhat irrelevant as a Peter Berg extravaganza that is based on a Hasbro toy. The thing that made my teen daughter’s face react the most was this notion that one man has to ask another man for his permission to marry his daughter. I know that this tradition is one of those time-honored for many, but is not for me or my family.

The other thing that is so obvious with the “world is going to end due to an extraterrestrial invasion” is that the American military is there to save the day. Even though in this movie the RIMPAC event was taking place and several countries were represented it ended up being the American Navy and some survivors from the Japanese Navy to save the day. The good news was that Rihanna starred in the movie and was in several scenes. Yay for the token, strong black woman. In all serious, she did have a pivotal role working weapons, carrying a gun, and having her clothes on in the movie! I can’t say the same thing about Brooklyn Decker and her role as eye candy in the movie. Decker had on lots of form-fitting outfits, short shorts, and pretty dresses.

Spoiler alert. The movie also offered its own homage to the men who have served via a scene celebrating them and later incorporating some of these retired servicemen in the use of the museum the USS Missouri. Yes, there is a scene in which these older men parade toward the lead character and ask what he needs. He needs them and they are willing to get the decommissioned battleship out to sea to kick some alien ass. I know…cue the national anthem. But, it was pretty darn sentimental and a smart scene in some respects. The old technology still needs the old guys to run it, though. Here, a different demographic gets a nod in the movie. Likewise, in all fairness to Decker she plays a Physical Therapist, so there is a long scene at a rehab with lots of male veterans getting physical therapy. The camera pans over these men who are missing a variety of different limbs. And, one character ends up having a pivotal role in the movie.

Overall, you need to just suspend your beliefs as you watch this over the top movie. Was it terrible? No, but then again I did use some of my Scene points to get one free ticket. Had I paid for both tickets perhaps I’d feel differently!

Fri Fun Facts: Gay Marriage/Same Sex Marriage

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Today’s Fri Fun Facts is dedicated to thinking about the continued fight for human rights in the US. Yes, I’m weighing in on Gay Marriage or Same Sex Marriage. I have to share that this issue is such a no brainer here in Victoria, BC Canada. Same Sex Marriage is legal in Canada since the Civil Marriage Act was passed in 2005. Wait, yes, just 7 years ago. Canada joins nine other countries:

Argentina, Belgium, Iceland, Netherlands, Norway, Portugal, South Africa, Spain and Sweden. There are other countries that allow same-sex marriages to be performed and then another group of countries that recognize same-sex marriages, but do not allow them to be performed. Let’s think about what is so problematic to 30 of the states in the US, which have taken special care to ban same-sex marriages.

1. “50% percent of first marriages, 67% of second and 74% of third marriages end in divorce, according to Jennifer Baker of the Forest Institute of Professional Psychology in Springfield, Missouri.” via DivorceRate.org. This does not say much to the whole “sanctity of marriage” line of argument. Looking for divorce statistic is interesting, as the data varies depending on the source that you examine and the government records them according to the number of divorces within the population: Divorce rate: 3.4 per 1,000 population (44 reporting States and D.C.) via http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/fastats/divorce.htm 2009 data.

2. Many supporters of the ban refer to the Bible. The most commonly quoted saying that I’ve heard, “The Bible refers to Adam and Eve and not Adam and Steve.” Fair enough, but I we don’t have everything in the Bible literally. And, not everyone subscribes to the teachings in the Bible. Using the Bible as the guide to politics might offer a short-sighted means of thought and practice.

3. We need to think about how the 14th Amendment offers equality under the law. The bans do anything but this and actually discriminate against unmarried partnerships (heterosexual) and against the LGBTQ community. Why are we allowing hate legislation? This is a human rights issue or a civil rights issue at the very least.

4. Bans against Same Sex Marriage are draconian at best. What they really demonstrate is that bigotry is alive and well and seeping into the law. We need to re-think the motivation for these sorts of laws and respond.

I support same sex marriage. And, unfortunately the Congressional Representative who does not represent me is in support of banning same sex marriage. Thankfully President Obama noted on May 9th that he is now in support of same sex marriage. With today’s Fri Fun Facts I am sending supportive energy to my sisters and brothers who demand that their families are protected by the states they live in or visit.

This was one of two emails that I received within hours of Obama’s interview.

Catching my Breath: One Week Post-Breathe Now

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It’s been more than a week and I am still processing the magic behind the Breathe Now ( #breatheyyj ) conference that I co-cordinated with Angela Rafuse-Tahir, Janice Mansfield, and Yukari Peerless. We wanted to organize a conference that we wanted to attend in Victoria. Between the four of us we have attended business women conferences, social media conference, academic conferences, BlogHer, Blissdom, and other work-related conferences. We wanted something completely different that spoke to women’s need to balance work and life and remembering to take time out for yourself and breathe.

The conference was a resounding success from head to toe. The energy was pulsating at the various panels and workshops that the 100 delegates attended. I saw lots of smiles, tears, and heads nodding during the presentations. A common theme throughout the weekend was that it’s important to have balance in our lives. Many women spoke to how imbalance led to different types of crises and the need to reflect and reboot life. I was pleasantly surprised to hear repeated speakers talk about how important therapy, exercise, sleep, eating right, and taking time out for oneself was crucial to mental health and overall physical well-being. When the conference ended, I got sentimental and felt a little sad that the weekend was ending, but so many great connections were made.

I’m thankful for all the emails, coffee dates, and tweets that I’ve read since the conference. I learned lots about myself, my friends, and the various speakers. Our choice of keynote speakers was perfect, too. Rona Maynard and Bif Naked both spoke their truths and offered the delegates a chance for important reflection. We all left the conference energized and ready for everything and anything. I look forward to chatting with my friends about Breathe Now 2013!

Working in Man’s World: #Breatheyyj

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It’s OK to be a Woman in a Man’s World! #Breatheyyj Really looking forward to this preso! Participants are: Marisa Goodwin @organicfoodme Anya Sereda @tinybean and Katie McDonald. What a great panel of woman who are working in male dominated fields. I just want to add that a great majority of the #BreatheNow meetings were held at Discovery Coffee, which Anya Sereda works for as their Green Bean Sourceress!

Sereda speaks to the coffee industry and refers to the baristas–the boys–as the show ponies, while the women are more apt to manage! It’s really interesting to hear about how so many coffee farms owned by women in the countries that she’s visited, but men run the farms. Interesting. I love that she admits to looking young. She’s 26 and looks like she’s 20. (Her words). She has a passion for beans, for coffee. And, after listening to her preso, she really knows coffee!

“Coffee has really taken me on a trip all around the world.” Anya Sereda

Her job sounds amazing. Out in the field doing her work… She noticed the ways that some people have treated her due to the issue of her youth and gender. She acknowledges her strengths and knowledge in the field and how it can at times be difficult for people to take her seriously. Happy sigh that my teen is here listening to this and hope it’s insightful to her and the rest of us in the audience.

The next speaker, Marissa Goodwin, reflected on her experience with her business Organicfair and the farm that she and her family run! She shared compelling stories about the level of sexism within the industry. We have more work to do! Looking at her bio it’s nice to see that their company includes 99% women employees. They are making change day to day in their work and their philosophy. Organicfair is based in Cobble Hill not too far from the Greater Victoria Region. Overall, Goodwin is another trailblazer! You, go!

The last speaker Katie McDonald is a mixologist who works at Veneto Tapa Lounge in Hotel Rialto. She has avoided thinking about being female in her career. She knows it’s there. “This elephant in the room.” I have to say that this is really common with lots of women—ignoring gender. But, she notes that we do need to think about gender. I like that she brought up equality and difference. Oh, those debates have not been resolved years later. Really? Some men call themselves, “Cocktailologist.” OK. She says that she’s a Mixologist or Bartender.

“It’s a dirty job. Lots of heavy lifting.” Katie McDonald

Interesting that for every one resume from a woman they field twenty resumes from men. And, this quote below also speaks to another binary in the job or industry. These quotes are telling. I’ll say it again and again: we have more work to do.

“If I’m the best female bartender on the line…you don’t have to compete with me.” Katie McDonald

She’s right, it’s an idealist view if we insist on saying that we’re all just people. This erases different components of identity. I do think that at times when people say this they are coming from a place of privilege and do not think that any difference exist at all. Again, this is in some instances and not meant as a sweeping generalization. And, McDonald notes that she wants to be just another Bartender and not the fact that she’s the “best woman bartender on the island.” On the flip side, she likes seeing women at competitions so that more women can/will attend these competitions. She’s sharing some honest, good points in her preso. I’m really enjoying the frank anecdotes.

“I do notice my gender.” Katie McDonald

Anti-Bullying Workshop: Part 2

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I previously blogged about an Anti-Bullying held on March 31st, 2012 that I attended in San Diego. The workshop was sponsored by Voices of Women and was for the local Somali community. The latter half of the panel included a community member and the local Police. The first presenter was Ramla Sahid, community organizer. Yes, I smiled when I heard this descriptor and after hearing her presentation I was so impressed. Did I share that she’s also a SDSU alum?! Yes, she is. This young woman is working for social change. “We are accountable to one another.” Hearing her say this was important. She was reminding the mothers and daughters in attendance. Yes, the audience was predominantly sex segregated and I will speak to this later.  She also gave a polite yet scathing commentary on how the tough on crime legislation and policies in California were counter-productive.

The other speakers were two police officers: one Lieutenant and one Detective. I am not using their names–both of them work in the community and I will leave it at that. The two really spoke to the intricacies of the laws regarding bullying and harassment. There were a few moments when I wondered if the presentation was right for this audience, but nonetheless their presentation was good. I also was at times fascinated by their guns. The guns looked out of place–I know that they were on duty, but after years in Canada I am not as used to seeing lots of guns around. (Humor). The officers noted that if bullying begins in primary school it only worsens in junior high and high school, so it’s important that we respond.

“Respect is universal.” Lots of head nodded when the Lieutenant made this statement. Farah noted that we need to get the men involved and that they need men only workshops. I am not sure if I agree, but then again I am not taking into the cultural considerations. Perhaps he is on to something and these male only workshops can also speak to the importance of fatherhood. More workshops is definitely something work thinking of given the proliferation of bullying and need to curb it in schools.

When the question and answer period took place Agin Shaheed noted that we must get the fathers involved. There were only mothers in attendance. He also noted that across the US 87% of teachers are women. (Is this why we keep on hearing the press and experts pick on teachers? Is there bullying against teachers because this is still viewed as women’s work? Maybe that is another post).

Anti-Bullying Workshop: Part 1

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I had the distinct pleasure of the Voices of Women’s (VOW) Anti-Bullying workshop in San Diego, California on March 31st 2012. VOW collaborated with the United Women of East Africa for this workshop. I was quite pleased to be in the minority in the crowd. The majority of the attendees were women from the Somali community in City Heights neighborhood in San Diego. The array of panelists provided insight into the policies and realities of anti-bullying today in San Diego and more specifically the San Diego Unified School District (SDUSD). The array of handouts that SDUSD uses with documenting bullying and the anti-bullying efforts impressed me. I kept multiple copies so that I could share them at home. And, here I include my screen shots.

The first speaker, Agin Shaheed, is an administrator with the SDUSD. His exact position focuses on Race Relations. I couldn’t help but think that his job must be incredibly rewarding and exhausting. Shaheed noted that the SDUSD is the largest school district in San Diego County and second largest in the state. This would make it behind the Los Angeles Unified School District (LAUSD). Shaheed opened up his remarks reading a moving poem he wrote. He reminded the audience of 50 about the murders of Shaima and Trayvon. I was glad I packed my tissues. Shaheed made a germane point about cyberbullying and the way it invades the home–it makes this form of bullying more invasive. Victims of cyberbullying are not safe anywhere.

The next speaker Maslah Farah, Director of the Neighborhood Unity Foundation shared that he was bullied and got into trouble while he was in school. He shared that the bullying stays with you for the rest of your life. He also opened up my eyes to how important cultural issues are. He noted that in Somalia families really look to the teachers as a second parent and that corporal punishment is more common in the schools or other forms of discipline that are not allowed here. (I could hear some warm laughter as he noted this). What I took from his talk is that he was kicked out of high school and is now successful and using his community work to mentor others in the community. He reminded us that we need to move away from a mainstream culture that enjoys witnessing misery.

This portion of workshop really made me think about the ways that we think about bullying. I also wondered what sorts of policy the local schools in Victoria (where I live) have regarding bullying. We can talk until we’re blue in the face about how bullying is bad, and that kids should not do it. But, until we practice this and don’t encourage bullying among adults we unfortunately model bad behavior. Just turn on some reality television shows and we can see and hear bullying. Look at some of the news magazine shows and we can also see the bullying nature by the hosts. We live in a society where bullying is rampant. Not to seem trite–but we  need to model better behavior.

Collegiality via Email: Suggestions for Students

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Last week I wrote about collegiality on campus and was really thinking about colleagues. Today I am thinking about students. Most of the original post applies; however, it is markedly different for students. I advise students and  I supervise students. But, I also assess student work and worth with graduate and undergraduate students in different capacities. I am in contact with lots of students and I had some interesting conversations with colleagues at #ISA2012 I know that email communication is a sore spot for lots of us.

I’ll list in no particular order some suggestions:

Never send an email that you have initial misgivings with or give you pause. Don’t send it. You might have a smartphone, but that doesn’t mean that you are making smart decisions. The tendency is to be less formal and send an incomplete sort of email.

Never send an email in anger or frustration concerning a mark. These situations really requires a face to face meeting. And, then you and the recipient have the record of your angry or frustrated email. Avoid sending an email that you might later feel sheepish about or regret.

Never send an email making statements that you wouldn’t say to someone’s face. We get brave  behind the screen or with the phone, so think before you send. Remember that your instructor or boss is not your peer and you should error on being more formal than informal.

What you should do if you feel you need to send an email: Send yourself the email and wait. Then, review the email. Practice smart computing and communicating.

Blogging Assignments: Yes, I’m Sold on Them

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For the last four to five years I have included a blogging assignment in my Women’s Studies or Political Science courses. During the last three years the blogging assignment is mandatory and I have found that most students find the assignment(s) liberating in that it offers them a place to combine analysis with a creative assignment. However, I find that it is good to offer some flexibility with the assignment. Last Summer students had an opportunity to blog, put together a zine or make an iMovie that responded to a series of course readings. Six to eight of them put together zines and more opted to blog. For the second year in a row–no one opted to complete the iMovie assignment. However, one person did vlogging for her assignment and I was pleased with her vlogs.

These creative assignments are coupled with class participation, and lots of writing–a major research paper. The students get ample opportunity to think and write. My expectations are that the series of blogs helps the student hone her/his analysis of the course readings and my comments, then, help them improve so that the final paper is not merely an extension, but the final product for their thoughtful analysis related to the course material. I will continue to offer them this opportunity to blog.

The blogging assignment also allows the student to become familiar with a blogging platform and I find that most students enjoy learning how to add different matter (photos, video clips and the like) to their posts. The students experience some pride of ownership with their particular blog and then they get to do that practical thing—add familiarity to said platform to their resume. That said, there is also a growing area of literature that is examining blogging as a genuine assignment in the classroom and the benefits of blogging. I do think that we will continue to see social media use in our classrooms and here I do not mean that student laughing or smiling into their hands, as they text one another. No, we will see more colleagues using social media platforms in the classroom assignments. How are you using Web 2.0 in your classroom?

Remembering to Breathe

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On Saturday, March 17th I had the distinct pleasure of participating in a Mom panel on Real Parenting with Shirley Broback and two of the three co-founders and organizers of Breathe Now. The interview was focused on parenting tweens and teens and what this means for us. It was a great interview and I was reminded how almost two years ago we decided that we wanted to organize a conference for women.

The idea was that we have all attended work-related conferences, mom conferences, and social media conferences, but we did not feel like there was a conference dedicated to the three in such a way that also dealt with issues unique to women. And, as I noted on Real Parenting the fateful meeting at Murchie’s was when we came up with the name, Breathe Now. We wanted to remind women that it’s important to inhale, exhale and breathe. We need to be nice to one another and more importantly to ourselves.

My involvement with Breathe Now has offered me opportunity to get to know the other three co-founders well. And, with that I’ve also met so many wonderful people in the local community. We see the conference as part of our project to build connections for women. We run the gamut, though, with a former government worker–turned personal chef, communications consultant, a hotel industry executive, and an academic. What we share with this conference is an acknowledgement of the importance of women supporting one another. There is so much knowledge that we can share with one another–but the only way this will be done is by taking the time to talk and chat.

Breathe Now offers a weekend of events that is sure to inspire. We are proud that Rona Maynard is our opening keynote and Bif Naked is our closing keynote. The array of our panels reminds women that it is OK to take time for yourself. We are also setting up our slate of panels to look at the theme of It’s OK.  For instance, it’s OK to take time out for yourself, it’s OK to be successful…this theme is important, as women often apologize for taking time out for themselves or for their success.

I’ll end saying that I hope to see you at the conference on April 14 and 15 2012 at the beautiful University of Victoria!